[Things were better, but they still weren't great. Rumlow knew that. Could tell that Bucky was still lost in the revelation. How could he blame him though? It was probably a natural reaction to try and reject everything, to start from scratch rather than pick up the pieces from the shattered illusion. Rumlow wasn't sure, this was unfamiliar territory.
He huffed to think that was a lot of what he dealt with when Bucky was involved. The biggest contributor to how differently he viewed his world, now. Rumlow stroked over his back, gathering into his hair and just touched him, held him, kept him near. The physical representation, he thought, of how he just wanted to support him.]
Both, I'd say. [A small, quiet laugh escaped him.] Ain't exactly ever been the most emotional guy.
[Rumlow rest his forehead against Bucky's shoulder, taking in a slow, shuddering breath. So many feelings were still bottled up inside him, trying to escape and fighting against the cage he kept them in -- the fear of showing this vulnerability in such a setting keeping him from letting it all out. He would speak, in quiet tones, but he couldn't let himself come apart like he knew he might, if they were alone.
Even now, in a moment as serious as this, HYDRA's training kept him in check.]
I... I thought you'd leave. [His arms wrapped tighter around him.] Guess I was afraid. It would mean I failed. Even now, I feel like I might have. Only thing that's keeping me from freaking the fuck out's you. Guess there ain't no protocol when you love someone.
no subject
He huffed to think that was a lot of what he dealt with when Bucky was involved. The biggest contributor to how differently he viewed his world, now. Rumlow stroked over his back, gathering into his hair and just touched him, held him, kept him near. The physical representation, he thought, of how he just wanted to support him.]
Both, I'd say. [A small, quiet laugh escaped him.] Ain't exactly ever been the most emotional guy.
[Rumlow rest his forehead against Bucky's shoulder, taking in a slow, shuddering breath. So many feelings were still bottled up inside him, trying to escape and fighting against the cage he kept them in -- the fear of showing this vulnerability in such a setting keeping him from letting it all out. He would speak, in quiet tones, but he couldn't let himself come apart like he knew he might, if they were alone.
Even now, in a moment as serious as this, HYDRA's training kept him in check.]
I... I thought you'd leave. [His arms wrapped tighter around him.] Guess I was afraid. It would mean I failed. Even now, I feel like I might have. Only thing that's keeping me from freaking the fuck out's you. Guess there ain't no protocol when you love someone.